its been quite sometime already since i last blogged. i have some thoughts going through my head, but don't know who to talk to, so i guess writing it out would be a better choice, and at the same time i could brush up my already fucked-up standards of copy-writing.
i am already a quarter of a century old. people around me are improving, getting better with their lives. but it looks like i m still standing at the same spot all the time.
perhaps, i am still the same old me. the same old me with the same temperament, character, mentality. there are people who doesn't like me, but i am glad that there are people who accepts me.
i used to believe in working hard. but sometimes life's just unfair. you don't get recognized for you efforts. someone who skips classes all the time can get more 'A's than a person who attends classes everytime punctually and submit work on time. you try to be nice, no one gives a damn or even wants to take a look at you, but when you do something bad for the first time, they start pointing fingers at you.
sometimes you don't mean to hurt someone, you didn't do it on purpose, you never mean anything, but that someone thinks otherwise. one single mistake, just one single unintentional accident, you are tagged "I HATE YOU, I AM NOT GOING TO FORGIVE YOU" for life.
i am not complaining about my life but rather i don't understand how life works. what must i do to deserve something good? why must we live in the way people wants us to be in order to gain acceptance?
no one understands what's going on my mind. i just have a way of thinking that not many people can accept and agree with.
perhaps that's why i am getting slacker and slacker, almost losing my directions in life. perhaps that is why i can't be bothered to be good or nice anymore. i have failed in many things in life, far too many things, far too many times, with each and everytime, unexplainable. i don't like losing to the people around me in anything that we do. but, how much must i fail to exchange for one success?
who can understand me? seriously..what's wrong? i don't know what i am trying to say either. i just feel disappointed what's all that's going on around me. but i'm glad i still have a bunch of brothers and sisters who's always there for me.